i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
