im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
