ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize