Pregnant stripper...not hot.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I touched a dick in church today
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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