I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
My Higher Power is John Stamos
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
