i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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