I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
