Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
