I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize