seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Randomize
