champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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