Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
