that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Randomize
