So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
