I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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