why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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