i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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