He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
