everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
