I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Randomize
