i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
