Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
