They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Randomize
