I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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