I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize