All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
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