I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
