There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize