I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Found your dick twin last night
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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