dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
