He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
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