I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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