Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
