Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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