Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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