sarcasm needs its own font
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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