He asked me if I "almost moaned"
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
