I don't remember. Are we still dating?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
