The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
