Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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