Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
