I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
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