My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
