I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
