I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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