you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
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