I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
