there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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