Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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