I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
